Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Christmas is just the disneyfication of christianity.

Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunderstorm or blare of trumpets to announce some special day. It is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.

I can see fireworks way too often through my window, even in summertimes. why? I have lost all the excitement about new years eve now. There`s nothing special about it anymore. It used to be the fireworks at midnight that everyone were waiting on new years eve. And even then they start firing too early, you can hear bangs several hours earlier. drives me mad!
And the christmas!!! I`m glad it`s only few days away, so now everone could calm down with this madness. They started it in the end of october!!! christmas songs, christmas shopping, christmas decoration, christmas christmas christmas.....
I´m not really against all that. I just think that the holiest of all days are those kept by ourselves in silence and apart; the secret anniversaries of the heart.

But to all of you who happen to read this - I wish you can spend christmas with the close ones you love, and celebrate the new year`s eve in the greatest way among greatest people!!

(it MIGHT be my last post, as this blog was actually one of the assignments for my "computer assisted journalism" course. It`s over now, and I`m not sure whether I should continue with it or not.)

All the best to you all!!!

Sunday, December 11, 2005

Zebra doesn`t help

From the early childhood a child is taught how to get about in traffic. You must always wait for the green light and follow the zebra! But no-one knows what is right anymore, there are more and more car accidents everyday. Cars are killing people when they try to cross the road following zebra,which is supposed to be the safe way. Even when the green light is on for the pedestrian. Number of accidents involving little children crossing roads has been highly increasing.
Drivers are still not careful enough, and ofcourse many of them don`t really care if a pedestrian wants to cross the road or not. Standing on side of the road, on zebra crossing, you can wait a long time before any car stops to let you through. I`ve had several situations where I was almost hit by a car. Roads with more than one line are especially dangerous, the first-line car notices and stops while the second-line car is questionable and so on. Every day can be the "judgment day". Scary! you have to take your chances by simply crossing roads.

"So many gods, so many creeds...so many paths that wind and wind.."

Ministry of education is seriously considering to add Religion as a subject to highschools` obligatory programm. Teachers and government approve, students strongly disapprove. Religion is such a fragile subject to discuss. And hence I think it can only be optional but perhaps not obligatory.
I studied in a highschool where it was compulsory to study religion. I have other things to believe in rather than God. So I was quite annoyed because of that. Luckily we had a very neutral teacher and the subject just covered the general beliefs of different religions. We weren`t pushed to believe in anything.
But I still think that a person will study the given subject independently if one is intereseted in it. And a student with a strong belief in some religion can feel very frustrated in class while discussing other ways of beliefs. And everything also depends on the teacher.

Ministry should be really careful with such a decision. (perhaps: "yes to teaching religion, no to religious propaganda")

something positive!

To be honest I think this blog has somehow influenced me. I´ve become more sad myself. So I will allow myself to add here something positive.

There`s a show on Estonian tv channel called " The glory of Estonia". It`s a show where they honor the people who have voluntarily helped Estonian society. For instance, there are so many of them who are trying to help homeless, who have saved lives, and so on. I`m glad that the channel is doing something like that.
I have a friend who does charity. He supports disabled children. On his birthday he told in advance to all his guests that instead of presents they should put the money (that was meant for presents) on the bank account of two boys in wheelchairs. They each got about 11 thousand krouns thanks to that birthday party. One of the boys could buy a new wheelchair now, which he badly needed.
I´m happy that there really are people, selfless people, who care a lot about others, help them, and don`t want anything in return.

(ignore this post)

it`s saturday, it`s 1 AM, no it`s not saturday anymore, it`s sunday now, it`s raining, I´m eating potato chips, thinking about the amount of studying I should do, exams, one guy stepped on my foot today and didn`t apologise, I`m stuck in Estonia, I don`t have a job, grrrrr...and the money, my day was pointless, I was wet when I got home, my camera is broken, I lost so many good photos that I wanted to add in my blog( I have to sart adding images from the net), I feel so blue :( , I`ve lost a day....

(huuh, I got it out of myself, I can go on now)

Saturday, December 10, 2005


There is one saying in Estonian "lapsesuu ei valeta", meaning that childs mouth doesn`t lie. It`s quite true.
I happend to over hear one interesting conversation. It was between two little russian children, a boy and a girl, both about 6 years old.
* * *
girl: "do you know what `sex´ means?"
boy: "yes"
girl: "it`s the same as fucking, hi-hi-hiii !" (sorry for swearing but that`s what she said)

girl: "have you ever had sex?"
boy: "yes, once in a kindergarten"
* * *

I guess it was just little kids exploring their sexuality and it`s not wrong. But I was just shocked about the words they used. They learn it from people they are surrounded with. And I´ve heard it myself (too many times) how carelessly parents can talk around their children. And that`s sad!

To whose profit???

Our country is dependant on every following generation. Most of the work has to be done by parents who bring their children up. A child needs parental support in every first step of one`s way. I suppose the saying "a child is a fire to be lit" sounds right, but it seems that our lawmakers took it word by word by giving 12-year-olds the right to train firing from a real gun. Is that wise? Maybe it depends on each specific individual if one is mature enough to take it in his hands, but I think it shouldn`t be generalised for everyone.

Few years ago a 10-year-old accidentaly killed himself from a sports gun.
Children are unstable, especially boys who like fooling around with everything.

If it`s not allowed for a 15-year-old to drive a car not even with assistance, then it`s not rational and not safer to give dangerous guns in the hands of a 12-year-old. They should be enjoying their childhood at that age and get ready for teenage, explore themselves. Are we preparing for somekind of a war? Do we need to enlarge Estonian army on account of children?
I wish they reconsidered..

Friday, December 09, 2005

mathematics isn`t always rational

I forgot to add to the previous post that apparently there`s been a calculation of an average salary in Estonia. And it`s 7000 krouns. The Government was so pleased to announce that salaries have been increasing this year. Well everyone knows now who`s salaries are increasing and thanks to what they get this higher average...but obviously this higher average salary does not refer to average people.

your job is to be homesick!

EU has come up with this genious idea how to increase salaries of our ministers. If working outside of country, they pay a compensation for being homesick. That`s no joke. The amount of the compensation is 15% of a salary. So, for instance our vice president of European Commission Siim Kallas gets accordingly to his monthly 300 000 salary 45 thousand krouns extra. It`s not all ofcourse, he also gets 8000 krouns for every member of his family...and some other things. anyway he gets 66 000 extra every month.Well...I guess you all know what I´m thinking right now. They shouldn`t say such things out loud in media. People are gonna feel so low.. this guy can get a new car every month if he wanted, or buy a huge house in a year without any bankloans. Just drives the average person mad.

it`s absurd!

Monday, December 05, 2005

"british stags UNwanted!!! "

Very popular topic at the moment - more and more places put up that kind of notices on their doors. Seems a bit cruel, but it`s true. Tallinn is a cheap place for brits to celebrate stagparties. I remember when I was working as a waitress. It was unbearable what kind of mess and noise they made. They also think that they can get all the women here. Sorry guys, from where I stand, our local men are far more desired. (With every kind of exceptions ofcourse, sadly)

"To do nothing and get something, formed a boy`s ideal of a manly career" - Benjamin Disraeli

I was in a nightclub on friday. This brittish guy started talking to me. I tried to avoid him, but couldn`t escape. We started talking and it came out that he was actually a very pleasant person. It was comfortable to talk to him. To my own surprise I told him about my life, about how hard it is to find a proper job, about my goals in life, about what I want to achieve. And you know...with the next sentence he just really pissed me off : "well find yourself a rich man like most young Estonian ladies do". I just laughed, said bye, and walked away.
Is it really that kind of reputation we, Estonian women, have?

Those who stand for nothing, fall for anything..

Sunday, December 04, 2005

friends 4ever

On my way home, through the crowded center town, I saw 2 guys standing against the wall, right next to each-other, talking, laughing, and peeing... like dogs, marking their area. So that few years from now, walking by that place, they could fall into memories "that`s the place where me and my best friend were peeing together" awwww....true friends.
Another childish image created by male representers. I`ve never seen women peeing on streets. Why is that? (no-one should feel offended by that, only if the person is one of those place markers on the streets where I walk everyday). That kind of images also create our reputation in the eyes of foreigners...